I tried. I really did. I studied for a good 15 minutes and then gave up. I swear i was never this way till last semester. I dont know what happened. I think i honestly just realized that i dont want to to be a career woman and that i dont need a degree for what i want to do. (I want to be a full time nanny and then start my own family). I can make just as much if not more money being a Nanny then doing a job with a degree. So for that reason i dont care anymore.Thats horrible i know. I am wasting money but my parents and whole family for that matter would flip out if i quit school. Yes i realize that if something were to happen to my husband and i needed to work that i would need a good job but being a Nanny is a great way to make money. Plus I am wasting thousands of dollars for a piece of paper that i do not intend to use. Awesome.I want to quit. Lets just be honest here. I am in school to please my family. But i am getting tired of that. I dont know what should i do. Some helpful thoughts from my readers would be nice. =)
Other thoughts: So remember that wall i mentioned in earlier blogs? Yes well that wall has been torn down. For that i am truly happy! All my fears and all my insecurities are gone. Vanished. Over. I am truly excited and happy about the relationship i am in right now. I dont care who knows it. I want the world to know that i found the one. The one i want to spend the rest of my life with. The one i want to be with till i die. I guess you can say our relationship has been 9 years in the making. Some might even say that i a rushing things when i say that i know he is the one. But when you know, you know. I have and always will love him. He makes me the happiest girl in the world and He truly amazes me each and every day.
If you didnt know, i am a really insecure person when it comes to looks. But for the first time EVER i actually feel beautiful without my make-up on. I love that he makes me feel that way. He has seen me at my worst and he still thinks and actually makes me BELIEVE that i am the most beautiful girl in the world. That is huge in my book. No one has ever made me feel this way.
God knew what he was doing when He put us both through the heartbreaks and the many tears shed from our past relationships. I am glad that i put all my trust in Him. I knew all along that he had the man of my dreams out there. Its just funny that what i was looking for all this time was right there in front of me.
He is and forever will be my best friend.
HH told me after the first time she met him that there is not better match for me then Dw! She loves us together. She then proceeded to tell me that she would kill me if i ruined it. Not him ruining it, but Me. Haha. Dont worry. I wont ruin this. I am not going anywhere.
Sorry Dw if this way too much info to be putting on my blog. I cant help it. I am just so dang crazy about you and so happy i couldnt help but share it with everyone. With all that said Dw, dont break my heart. No pressure ok. haha im kidding. Para Siempre Mi Amor.
Its rainy here in the Boro today. I miss the sunshine. I plan on trying to study more tonight and then me and Wendy are hanging out later!
love,
LT
"In your darkest hours, Well I love you still. I have and I always will"
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